New start for a drug abuser!

by Theresa Webb
(lincoln,delaware)

It all started back in year 2001 when I meant this guy through my husband at the time.

This guy named lee and I got very close to each other. And we started hanging out more and more.

And then the unthinkable happened we got involved with each other(oh my God how was I going to tell my husband that I messed up?) And then after 2 months went by and I told my husband the truth me and my husband split up.

I went to a shelter and he stayed in our home until I decided to fight him for it. When I got my place back that is when it all started cause I had this guy move in with me and my 1 year old daughter at the time.

Well I had noticed he would be gone a lot at nights and would return home sometime the next day and I sit on the floor crying and asking God to show me the truth about this man and wouldn't you believe He did.

Cause I looked up and there he was standing in front of me with a male friend of his and had some type of crystal like drugs on a piece of cardboard.

I ask him what in the world was that cause I have never seen anything like it in my life time. He told me it was a form of cocaine but it was called crack cause it was hard like a rock.

So we had words and then they went down into my basement from where they came from.I went right down after them and sat there and they were smoking it and so i decided that i wanted to try it.

So they let me and after that one hit i wanted more and more.I smoked this drug up until august. 2005 and then I was clean from it for two years cause we moved out of our state to a state where we did not know where to get it.

And in May, 2009 I came back to my state I was from and was still doing good staying away from the drugs, but in October 2007 I messed up and Lee and I went out and got high together.

I lost my home, my husband, a car, all new clothes and possessions and me and my husband had just got a large sum of money of $10,000.00 and I lost that too.

I had started out with a $20.00 a day habit which led up to becoming a $1000.00 a day habit. I done stuff for drugs I am not proud of. And drugs ruined my life.

I ended getting into trouble with the law for forgery in the 2nd degree and now have a felony on my record (which I never had before)and still on probation for it.

I can't get a home of my own for me and my two children now cause people look at my record and won't give me a chance even though I have not used since September, 2007.

I been into drug treatment program for 1 yr and half, went to cda, a.a, na, family counseling, individual counseling and parenting classes through children's and families first.

I have done the 30 day what I am grateful for journal and I have done steps 1-3 all by myself but got stuck on step-3. This road may not be an easy road but it is much better then the life I lived before.

I am a responsible parent now and making better choices. I still have issues just like anyone else but I am not giving up on myself, my recovery or my family.

All's I know if you are an addict and need help there is help out there you just have to want it bad enough to get it.

Don't let anyone tell you differently. I know I've been there and still going through it but my recovery is worth everything to me.