MY STORY

by Dominique Richmond
(manteca ca)

Hi my name is dominique richmond im a 25 year old female.

I was born and raised in Oakland, California its a drug city if your not selling then you are pimping or prostituting the drug game got me at a young age my mother left me in the hospital she was and still is an alcoholic and addict

My grandmother took custody of me and my father was and still is an addict, so she took me and my brother and sister. The whole chain I come from is drugs and alcohol, only one in my family is clean.

My childhood was rough, I was in and out of foster care group homes. I ran away to be with my mother who didn't want me. I got put in Juvenal hall for 9 months cause no one wanted me.

My brother took custody of me which was the start of my nightmare with drugs. I started using meth at the age of 17 with my brother. I wish it came with a warning label but it didn't. I had my first child at 18 and for the next 4 years I had my other babies.

My first son was born with meth in his system it broke my heart. I went through it alone and the doctors wouldn't touch me, they acted like i was nothing. I was scared because I thought I was going to loose my son but I got to take him home.

I got involved with a guy who was just as worst as me. It was a toxic relationship, a lot of emotional and physical abuse and my children were caught in the cross fire.

My nightmare started the day I lost all my children. The placer county removed them away from me and told me I had to go to rehab. I was willing to do anything to get my life back.

My kids were my life and I went to rehab for 6 months. I worked the steps but I had reservations. I graduated with my kids and I was free.

I thought I won, not knowing that I wasn't healed, I will never be healed. I left and relapsed and my kids got taken away again. The pain was so unbearable I started to cut my arms.

I couldn't take the pain in my heart. I was facing this nightmare alone. They recommended that I go back to rehab and I did. They gave me a lot of freedom and I took that and ran with it.

I drank while I was there and got my roommate drunk and we both got kicked out and I lost my kids for good.

Today, I'm facing and battling with my addiction. My girlfriend and her children give me a reason to be clean. She's not an addict so sometimes she doesn't understand.

I've had a couple slip ups with meth and I drink everyday. I need help. I can't loose my family I have with her. She loves me but she can't see me destroy myself.

She will not tolerate me using meth. I want to change, but the cravings are unbearable at times.

I want to be clean, I have to be.